Notable Turtle #1: Vijay Mallya

Nobody epitomises the Turtle-Dove paradigm as the King of Good Times Mr. Vijay Mallya.



Observe his flying-turtle antecedents. Born into a wealthy distilling family, Vijay apprenticed under his most un-turtle-like father Vittal Mallya until taking control of the United Breweries group at age 29.

Since then he has led a lavish lifestyle featuring:
a. loss-making yachts

b. loss-making F1 teams
c. loss-making cricket teams
d. loss-making airlines

The last is so notable that the NYTimes thought it fit to write an article about it. I excerpt:

Kingfisher Airlines of India promised passengers the royal treatment — flight attendants so comely they were called “flying models,” full meals even on short flights and curbside valets to carry their bags.

But how the mighty have fallen.

Short of cash and unable to pay its bills, the company has had to take on debt from India’s government-owned banks, pledge assets in exchange for loan guarantees, postpone delivery of new planes and search for a foreign investor.

Most symbolic, perhaps, instead of starting nonstop flights from India to California — as envisioned by the company’s flamboyant founder, Vijay Mallya — the airline last added a route from Calcutta to Dhaka, the capital city of Bangladesh.


He also has a bottled water business, which if he manages to lose money on, would be a minor act of genius.

The most creditable thing young Vijay did (which middle-aged Vijay is doing his best to destroy) is to unite all the various brands he inherited under one uber-title: Kingfisher. A move apparently modelled after another global mega-brand: Virgin.

Vijay himself appears to be mirroring his look upon Sir Richard Branson, down to the stringy salt-and-pepper look.



But he's missing a few parallels in the analogy
a. Branson was born poor, Vijay was not
b. Branson flies hot-air balloons, Vijay is a hot-air balloon
c. Branson is reportedly dyslexic, whie Vijay can read

The last fast is supposed to cause youngmiddle-aged Vijay bouts of gnashing fury. Which explains that stringy hair, all over again.

Vijay, wake up. Sell the sports teams and focus on your businesses. Turtles will hurtle!

Related articles:
After scaling the heights Richard Branson plans to plumb the depths (telegraph.co.uk)
Vijay Mallya Buys Gandhi Items in Auction (kisaso.com)